Crashed bad on Lamictal

[6-Eggs!]

Recent research into visual snow syndrome, common with psych drug withdrawal. I have VSS very bad myself. They found with a complete PET scan screening of all the neurotransmitters across control, migraine and VSS people, in VSS specifically glutamate and serotonin pathways heavy in 2a receptors had poor functional connectivity. Makes sense that lowering glutamate activity would make us ill as we already likely have issues with the glutamate pathways.

[justprocess1]

And now a bad wave. Back to numbness. I was really encouraged by the window I had though. Typically when that happens its just a matter of time before it comes back.

[justprocess1]

My genitals are completely numb

[justprocess1]

I hadn’t seen my girlfriend for like three days. And I had some extreme reactive libido. Was very very turned on and had good sex with a girlfriend. Things were still numb, but there was some sensitivity back on a deeper level. And I actually climaxed from physical sex itself. The orgasm was very good. at this point, I’m basically Demisexual and only have sexuality that is reactive. By myself, I basically have no libido or feeling.

[justprocess1]

This happened again 2 days later. Now back to it being more numb. The long periods are beginning to last longer. I think some recovery is happening.

[justprocess1]

Now back to total PSSD. This windows and waves thing is so scary sometimes.

[justprocess1]

Again, I didn’t see my girlfriend for a few days. In between seeing her I was completely asexual. No libido. Total genital numbness. Absolutely nothing sexual in terms of feeling.

She came over and I immediately got extremely aroused and sex actually felt good and I was able to orgasm from mutual masturbation with my girlfriend. The orgasm felt really good. It’s extremely bizarre. I am fully demisexual at this point. Without a stimulus. I’m completely asexual. But around the right person. I have a high sex drive. What’s interesting is that when we went for the second round a little bit later in the evening, it felt numb. So it’s just very strange.

[justprocess1]

After I wrote this post I had a major positive window. More sensitivity. Cumming consistently from PIV sex, and better libido. Good erections.


I then entered a very deep depressive episode, and despite the PSSD healing to some degree I was in crisis mentally. I went on Viibyrd for about 5 weeks. Currently I have tapered off, as it got me through the episode. (my mom died in January, and I got a divorce back in December, so a lot on my place).

Currently.

1. I have no libido, not even really reactive libido
2. Orgasms are hard to get, but still ok
3. I have almost total genital numbness again
4. Erections are not good at all and hard to get.

We will see if I recover again, like I did from lamictal.