infinityzer00000 Log

General discussions. Feel free to use this like a support group also.
lukejimmy
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Re: Your reality and what I have to say.

Unread post by lukejimmy »

raven100 wrote:I think that there is a valid theory here. SSRI acts as a catalyst to those with previous unaddressed trauma/traumatic agent in its own right. Shuts down the body in a way similar to what you see in some PTSD cases.

Tackling the underlying trauma via a good psychotherapist will be the answer for some here, and we've seen a few long term members recover this way. I don't think it'll be the answer for most of us, but it may be part of the answer for many of us. I really don't think we know enough about PSSD to say otherwise. We definitely don't know enough about PSSD to say that those who recovered in this way didn't have 'real' PSSD.

What I really hate is the attitude 'SSRIs fucked me up so now there's zero point in working on fostering positive mental health because I need a chemical fix to get to 100%.' Not saying those above necessarily have this attitude but I sure did my first year of PSSD. It's a wholly unhelpful attitude and if you're anything like me you'll benefit massively from dropping it.
I agree that PSSD and other drug induced Protracted/Post-Acute Withdrawal syndromes is strangely similar to PTSD particularly with chronic Anhedonia and Depersonalization/Derealization being the main symptomatology which makes sense that SSRI's like MDMA and prescription Prozac, Zoloft etc are very successful for treating PTSD. But trauma is not a factor in what causes PSSD but know that i think about it might prolong it? Anyway my point is that it doesn't matter how positive you mental state or how good your psychotherapist, the fact is if you can't change the physical observable changes in the neurochemistry that causes the PTSD symptoms such as Anhedonia caused by changes in catecholamine levels. A good example of this is you can adress and come to terms with trauma but it wont change the fact that traumatic experiences like war conflicts are extremely stimulating and put you in an elevated survival state for prolonged periods of time and victims have reported that they are addicted to it like an extremely euphoric drug to the point that when they return to civilian life everything is dull, boring and are unable to experience pleasure because their brains are dependent on this elevated trauma induced state like a drug. This basically mirrors addiction in people who experience protacted severe anhedonia after discontinuing extremely pleasurable euphoriants like Cocaine, Opioids and even SSRI's (an obvious more potent example being MDMA but prescription SSRI's aswell). So basically the only true cure is a 100% chemical fix but you are right in that developing resilience and other positive mental traits is the only way we can be productive in finding this chemical cure.
lukejimmy
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Re: Your reality and what I have to say.

Unread post by lukejimmy »

infinityzer00000 wrote:
RainebowGirl wrote:
infinityzer00000 wrote:The first thing you will feel and believe is that you are broken, which is true, you most certainly are.
Whoa, chill lol.
Lot of assumptions there. I don't weigh my worth as a person on my ability to have an orgasm. It bothers me, but I don't think I'm broken and there are more than a few of us who just live our everyday lives with this issue and see it as something we want to recover from... not proof that we're ~broken~ :lol:
infinityzer00000 wrote:This situation is extreme shock/trauma/stress that you are currently dealing with
I mean... it took me a year or two to even realize what this was because I really wasn't all that broken up about it lol I'm not traumatized because I can't have good orgasms right now. I've had much more traumatizing things happen that didn't affect my brain the way that SSRIs did.

Look, dude... I'm glad you found something that helped you, but I'm not sure that projecting your experience on to others is the best play. It sounds like maybe you didn't have PSSD in the first place and ignorantly believe that none of us do, either. A lot of us have done therapy, and there are many of us who aren't even traumatized/stressed about this... just looking for answers. I do think a lot of people need to hit this from multiple angles and work on their mental health as a whole before they immediately start trialing a bunch of things, but even I see you're assuming that what worked for you can cure everyone.

Had you presented this as something others may want to look into if they aren't having results elsewhere, or as a beneficial addition to any mental health treatment, I would have agreed. But this entire spiel sounds kinda patronizing.

Man... the worst part is that you've been here for 4 years... And you're still this patronizing. Yikes.

How am I being patronizing? I'm posting about how I got better and it was an alternative to taking more drugs, which can offer some people hope when they might feel like there is none.

No where am I saying not to do something which includes taking drugs. If you dont feel broken than that's great but it's a trend with people in this forum and something I've experienced. You're the one being a condescending asshole.

Others have messaged me directly to say that what I'm talking about may make sense in their life and if its helps them then great.

All I can tell you are the facts. I woke up one day after stopping luvox for 6 years and lost everything that made me human. Emotions, libido, excitement, joy and the ability to dream and sleep. That has all come back.


I'm drug free and hopefully others can be as well and heal from this miserable hell.
Its more likely that this was just your post-acute withdrawal syndrome finally coming to end after 6 years after your brain was able to eventually restore homeostasis to what it was before ever taking the drugs and is not necessarily related to your PTSD at all. I'm sure there countless people who like you after suffering for what feels like multiple lifetimes just wake up one morning and spontaneous feel like they are back to how the were prior to the drugs and are fully recovered by basically doing nothing conciously until their neurochemical dependence to whatever SSRI disappears completely
finities infinities
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by finities infinities »

lukejimmy- Yes, that's why I wrote in this forum. Carbamazepine also has serotonergic effects as SRA, so its withdrawal symptoms may be similar. Even worse, I found research that says it acts as an HDAC inhibitor and increases allopregnanolone levels.
Which would concur with my suspicion that SSRIs with severe anhedonia are similar to benzo, because allopregnanolone is GABAA positive allosteric modulator and induce similar withdrawal- allopreganolone withdrawal.
lukejimmy
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by lukejimmy »

finities infinities wrote:lukejimmy- Yes, that's why I wrote in this forum. Carbamazepine also has serotonergic effects as SRA, so its withdrawal symptoms may be similar. Even worse, I found research that says it acts as an HDAC inhibitor and increases allopregnanolone levels.
Which would concur with my suspicion that SSRIs with severe anhedonia are similar to benzo, because allopregnanolone is GABAA positive allosteric modulator and induce similar withdrawal- allopreganolone withdrawal.
Increased levels of allopregnanolone can produce paradoxical effects, including negative mood, anxiety, irritability, and aggression.[17][18][19] This appears to be because allopregnanolone possesses biphasic, U-shaped actions at the GABAA receptor – moderate level increases (in the range of 1.5–2 nM/L total allopregnanolone, which are approximately equivalent to luteal phase levels) inhibit the activity of the receptor, while lower and higher concentration increases stimulate it.[17][18] This seems to be a common effect of many GABAA receptor positive allosteric modulators.[14][19] In accordance, acute administration of low doses of micronized progesterone (which reliably elevates allopregnanolone levels) has been found to have negative effects on mood, while higher doses have a neutral effect.[20]
If it only has a neutral effect when at higher doses that bypass the paradoxical effects so im not sure if elevations in allopregnanolone would increase stimulation more then baseline pre-PSSD levels. This doesn't really explain why Opioids and Cocaine withdrawal causes anhedonia as they have no effect on GABAA receptors so it must relate to dopamine because all of drug classes that induce Post-Acute Withdrawal anhedonia seem to have in common significant long-term alterations the reward systems in the brain.
lukejimmy
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by lukejimmy »

finities infinities wrote:lukejimmy- Yes, that's why I wrote in this forum. Carbamazepine also has serotonergic effects as SRA, so its withdrawal symptoms may be similar. Even worse, I found research that says it acts as an HDAC inhibitor and increases allopregnanolone levels.
Which would concur with my suspicion that SSRIs with severe anhedonia are similar to benzo, because allopregnanolone is GABAA positive allosteric modulator and induce similar withdrawal- allopreganolone withdrawal.
Increased levels of allopregnanolone can produce paradoxical effects, including negative mood, anxiety, irritability, and aggression.[17][18][19] This appears to be because allopregnanolone possesses biphasic, U-shaped actions at the GABAA receptor – moderate level increases (in the range of 1.5–2 nM/L total allopregnanolone, which are approximately equivalent to luteal phase levels) inhibit the activity of the receptor, while lower and higher concentration increases stimulate it.[17][18] This seems to be a common effect of many GABAA receptor positive allosteric modulators.[14][19] In accordance, acute administration of low doses of micronized progesterone (which reliably elevates allopregnanolone levels) has been found to have negative effects on mood, while higher doses have a neutral effect.[20]

If it only has a neutral effect when at higher doses that bypass the paradoxical effects so im not sure if elevations in allopregnanolone by SSRI or Carbamezepine would increase stimulation more then baseline pre-PSSD levels. This doesn't really explain why Opioids and Cocaine withdrawal causes anhedonia as they have no effect on GABAA receptors so it must relate to dopamine because all of drug classes that induce Post-Acute Withdrawal anhedonia seem to have in common significant long-term alterations the reward systems in the brain.
finities infinities
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by finities infinities »

lukejimmy- hmmm, this is interesting. All problem is maybe from NMDA hypersensitivity. NMDA receptor is opposite to GABAA receptor and D2 receptor. Maybe problem is this, but I don't know I only thinking :D
JakeLawe
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by JakeLawe »

JK24 wrote: Sat May 11, 2019 5:15 am I wanted to add my own experience if I may. I have suffered from depression on and off for the past few years, but over the last year it has gotten way worse. I took 5-HTP for a few days in January 2019 and have experienced PSSD symptoms after that.

Now here it goes: I agree with the OP and also with success stories like the one from Bunny. I also had lack of nocturnal erections and believed, this cannot be psychosomatic. However, there IS a link between hormones and thoughts. That‘s why you can treat depression both with psychotherapy and drugs! Cognitive behavioural therapy changes your irrational, twistes thoughts that causes your depression (which is NEVER based on realistic thoughts - read „Feeling Good“ by David Burns if you want to find out more), and drugs change hormones - BOTH have the effect of making you less depressed. So CLEARLY, thoughts can change hormones, and hormones/drugs can change thoughts. How could it be differently?

Furthermore, regular depression, without any medication envolved DOES cause physical symptoms! If you feel extremely tired or lose your appetite or slur your speech because you‘re depressed, those are PHYSICAL symptoms. So depression can cause physical symptoms just as much as medication can.

My view on this whole thing is that it can be treated ANALOGOUSLY to depression: by medication, by psychotherapy, or BOTH. My approach, just as for my depression, has been: I don‘t want to take antidepressants, I choose psychotherapy. And it has worked so far! EVER SINCE I started telling myself the following „I have low libido. Low libido is a SYMPTOM of depression. I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD have low libido as long as I suffer from depression“ my symptoms have IMPROVED. Once during sex with my ex-girlfriend she gave me a blowjob and I felt NOTHING. But then I quickly told myself: „Loss of pleasure from activities I used to enjoy is a SYMPTOM of depression, and I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD get no pleasure from this blowjob“ and in an INSTANT, I felt more! In an INSTANT, as SOON as I relaxed JUST A BIT MORE, the blowjob felt AMAZING.

The same approach worked for basically COMPLETELY curing myself from pleasureless orgasms within a few days. I had a few good days where my depresion was almost gone, and when I masturbated I just told myself that sexual anhedonia, i.e. pleasureless orgasms, is a symptom of depression, therefore I should suffer from it. My orgasm quality improved CONSIDERABLY and has done ever since, to the point where I‘ve gotten USED TO having good orgasms again.

My morning erections also started returning when I stopped obsessing.

I have yet ANOTHER argument why this whole thing is psychosomatic, that was quite convincing to me: I NEVER really found any symptom that CANNOT be caused by depression. EVERY symptom I experienced and subsequently searched for, had depression as one possible cause. No matter what symptom I had, it could ALWAYS be attributed to depression.

Now some of you might say: But some of my symptoms are hard to describe, I just feel weird, not like myself.
Well, excessively worrying about your health and feeling weird, is a SYMPTOM OF DEPRESSION. In my life, 100% of the cases where I told someone „I just feel weird, I can‘t explain it, I feel like not my normal self, I can‘t stand it, I just want everything to be back to normal again!!“ it was PSYCHOSOMATIC, and I snapped out of it at the latest when I visited a doctor and he told me there was no physical reason.

ANOTHER argument that gave me a hint that it was psychosomatic, was that my symptoms always IMPROVED after I visited a doctor and I stopped worrying about the condition for a minute. The first time after I visited my GP, my girlfriend and I had FANTASTIC sex and I thought I was cured. Then I started worrying again and it started getting worse again. Have you ever notied that the more you worry, the worse the symptoms get? That gave me the clue that it‘s psychosomatic, because no PHYSICAL illness I‘ve ever had had this property. The second time after I visited the doctor and he told me „FORGET about the 5-HTP. It‘s 99% psychosomatic but I‘ll get you a transfer to an andrologist and check your hormones anyway, if it will help you relax and stop worrying“, my symptoms improved again!

On thing I also experienced: I worried about my testicle size. Anytime I felt bad, I could almost FEEL my testicles shrinking, thinking I had low testosterone. I SAW that they looked smaller. They FELT smaller. It was so PHYSICAL, it was so REAL. Can‘t be the depression, right? You CANNOT shrink your testicles by having irrational, twisted thoughts, right? So it MUST be physical. Well, I put my belief TO THE TEST: I MEASURED my testicles every day, sometimes when I thought they looked normal and healthy, and also when I felt like they are small and unhealthy. They were ALWAYS EXACTLY THE SAME SIZE. I THOUGHT that they looked smaller, I was CONVINCED. But it WASN‘T ACTUALLY TRUE. Furthermore I looked up „average testicle size“ and concluded that my testicles were even slightly above average in size, but totally in the normal range. I STOPPED worrying about my testicles since then!

The SAME thing happened with my sperm volume. I thought that I was producing less sperm. It MUST be physical right? Well, I started measuring and quickly found out that the sperm volume was not only always the same, it was also always in the normal healthy range (normal is 2-5ml, 4 ml being about a teaspoon full). Since then I STOPPED worrying about sperm volume and started having more normal feeling ejaculations.

I could go on, but you get the gist. If you want to find out more about cognitive behavioural therapy and how your thoughts influence your feelings, check out „Feeling Good“ by David Burns. Great book!

If you want to find out more about excessive worrying about your health / hypochondria, check out Wikipedia. For me, it was eye-opening to see that it seems to be a SYMPTOM of hypochondria that your symptoms improve after a visit at the doctor - it was the same way for me!

Finally, one thing that has helped me a lot was any kind of activity where you stop thinking - especially exercise. If you go for a run, or lift weights, or swim, or go cycling, and do it in way where you FOCUS on your BODY AND BREATH, or do it so fast that you are FORCED to take a BREAK FROM THINKING AND WORRYING, this can go a long way to help you relax and feel better. For me this has worked often.

One final note on 5-HTP: Since both DRUGS and PSYCHOTHERAPY/THOUGHTS can influence feelings, I think it‘s in no wqy implausible that a sudden withdrawal from an SSRI or 5-HTP can TRIGGER such symptoms and also thoughts that cause excessive worrying, just as durgs can alleviate depression symtpoms. However, you CAN treat them by changing your THOUGHTS, just as you can treat your depression by changing your thoughts. You see what I mean? That‘s just a basic feature of mental illnesses like depression, where both drugs and therapy can influence your symptoms. For me, PSSD falls into that same category.
I agree with you. I'd give you the $100,000 prize but I imagine people want something "physical" as the "cure". Also if you're like me, you could careless about that and prefer your health.

Are we 100% sure this is it? nope, not me anyway, it could be something else, 5H1 whatever.. is the simplest answer usually the correct one? I'd say so, Occam's razor.

Does acknowledging this reverts things back automatically? no. In fact now the real work begins and I suspect is harder, way harder than swallowing pills (Though, may/could/can include that too!)

Does it helps with the despair of not knowing wtf is going on? I'd say so (abandoning hope, when possible, also helps with despair!)

I've been reading some of the books you suggest. I'd add: "The emperor's new drugs" by Irving Kirsch, too.

Are these symptoms real? absolutely. Can they drive a man to despair and even kill him? apparently.

The friggin mind distracting us from the true issue at hand which wasn't/ isn't our balls and dick but our mental health.

The friggin mind waiting for the right moment to make us think the cause was a pill, certainly not acting like a friend!

If I ever get my 100% back, i won't be returning. Take this as a sign I forgot about this forum (which has served it's purpose and thank you for that, Ghost) and went on with the next episodes of my life.

I'd call this: PPATAPP (psychosomatic phenomenon after taking a placebo pill).

Thank you for the perspective, Infinitizer.

Love and Compassion, brother.
arahant
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by arahant »

JakeLawe wrote: Sat Oct 10, 2020 1:43 pm
JK24 wrote: Sat May 11, 2019 5:15 am I wanted to add my own experience if I may. I have suffered from depression on and off for the past few years, but over the last year it has gotten way worse. I took 5-HTP for a few days in January 2019 and have experienced PSSD symptoms after that.

Now here it goes: I agree with the OP and also with success stories like the one from Bunny. I also had lack of nocturnal erections and believed, this cannot be psychosomatic. However, there IS a link between hormones and thoughts. That‘s why you can treat depression both with psychotherapy and drugs! Cognitive behavioural therapy changes your irrational, twistes thoughts that causes your depression (which is NEVER based on realistic thoughts - read „Feeling Good“ by David Burns if you want to find out more), and drugs change hormones - BOTH have the effect of making you less depressed. So CLEARLY, thoughts can change hormones, and hormones/drugs can change thoughts. How could it be differently?

Furthermore, regular depression, without any medication envolved DOES cause physical symptoms! If you feel extremely tired or lose your appetite or slur your speech because you‘re depressed, those are PHYSICAL symptoms. So depression can cause physical symptoms just as much as medication can.

My view on this whole thing is that it can be treated ANALOGOUSLY to depression: by medication, by psychotherapy, or BOTH. My approach, just as for my depression, has been: I don‘t want to take antidepressants, I choose psychotherapy. And it has worked so far! EVER SINCE I started telling myself the following „I have low libido. Low libido is a SYMPTOM of depression. I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD have low libido as long as I suffer from depression“ my symptoms have IMPROVED. Once during sex with my ex-girlfriend she gave me a blowjob and I felt NOTHING. But then I quickly told myself: „Loss of pleasure from activities I used to enjoy is a SYMPTOM of depression, and I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD get no pleasure from this blowjob“ and in an INSTANT, I felt more! In an INSTANT, as SOON as I relaxed JUST A BIT MORE, the blowjob felt AMAZING.

The same approach worked for basically COMPLETELY curing myself from pleasureless orgasms within a few days. I had a few good days where my depresion was almost gone, and when I masturbated I just told myself that sexual anhedonia, i.e. pleasureless orgasms, is a symptom of depression, therefore I should suffer from it. My orgasm quality improved CONSIDERABLY and has done ever since, to the point where I‘ve gotten USED TO having good orgasms again.

My morning erections also started returning when I stopped obsessing.

I have yet ANOTHER argument why this whole thing is psychosomatic, that was quite convincing to me: I NEVER really found any symptom that CANNOT be caused by depression. EVERY symptom I experienced and subsequently searched for, had depression as one possible cause. No matter what symptom I had, it could ALWAYS be attributed to depression.

Now some of you might say: But some of my symptoms are hard to describe, I just feel weird, not like myself.
Well, excessively worrying about your health and feeling weird, is a SYMPTOM OF DEPRESSION. In my life, 100% of the cases where I told someone „I just feel weird, I can‘t explain it, I feel like not my normal self, I can‘t stand it, I just want everything to be back to normal again!!“ it was PSYCHOSOMATIC, and I snapped out of it at the latest when I visited a doctor and he told me there was no physical reason.

ANOTHER argument that gave me a hint that it was psychosomatic, was that my symptoms always IMPROVED after I visited a doctor and I stopped worrying about the condition for a minute. The first time after I visited my GP, my girlfriend and I had FANTASTIC sex and I thought I was cured. Then I started worrying again and it started getting worse again. Have you ever notied that the more you worry, the worse the symptoms get? That gave me the clue that it‘s psychosomatic, because no PHYSICAL illness I‘ve ever had had this property. The second time after I visited the doctor and he told me „FORGET about the 5-HTP. It‘s 99% psychosomatic but I‘ll get you a transfer to an andrologist and check your hormones anyway, if it will help you relax and stop worrying“, my symptoms improved again!

On thing I also experienced: I worried about my testicle size. Anytime I felt bad, I could almost FEEL my testicles shrinking, thinking I had low testosterone. I SAW that they looked smaller. They FELT smaller. It was so PHYSICAL, it was so REAL. Can‘t be the depression, right? You CANNOT shrink your testicles by having irrational, twisted thoughts, right? So it MUST be physical. Well, I put my belief TO THE TEST: I MEASURED my testicles every day, sometimes when I thought they looked normal and healthy, and also when I felt like they are small and unhealthy. They were ALWAYS EXACTLY THE SAME SIZE. I THOUGHT that they looked smaller, I was CONVINCED. But it WASN‘T ACTUALLY TRUE. Furthermore I looked up „average testicle size“ and concluded that my testicles were even slightly above average in size, but totally in the normal range. I STOPPED worrying about my testicles since then!

The SAME thing happened with my sperm volume. I thought that I was producing less sperm. It MUST be physical right? Well, I started measuring and quickly found out that the sperm volume was not only always the same, it was also always in the normal healthy range (normal is 2-5ml, 4 ml being about a teaspoon full). Since then I STOPPED worrying about sperm volume and started having more normal feeling ejaculations.

I could go on, but you get the gist. If you want to find out more about cognitive behavioural therapy and how your thoughts influence your feelings, check out „Feeling Good“ by David Burns. Great book!

If you want to find out more about excessive worrying about your health / hypochondria, check out Wikipedia. For me, it was eye-opening to see that it seems to be a SYMPTOM of hypochondria that your symptoms improve after a visit at the doctor - it was the same way for me!

Finally, one thing that has helped me a lot was any kind of activity where you stop thinking - especially exercise. If you go for a run, or lift weights, or swim, or go cycling, and do it in way where you FOCUS on your BODY AND BREATH, or do it so fast that you are FORCED to take a BREAK FROM THINKING AND WORRYING, this can go a long way to help you relax and feel better. For me this has worked often.

One final note on 5-HTP: Since both DRUGS and PSYCHOTHERAPY/THOUGHTS can influence feelings, I think it‘s in no wqy implausible that a sudden withdrawal from an SSRI or 5-HTP can TRIGGER such symptoms and also thoughts that cause excessive worrying, just as durgs can alleviate depression symtpoms. However, you CAN treat them by changing your THOUGHTS, just as you can treat your depression by changing your thoughts. You see what I mean? That‘s just a basic feature of mental illnesses like depression, where both drugs and therapy can influence your symptoms. For me, PSSD falls into that same category.
I agree with you. I'd give you the $100,000 prize but I imagine people want something "physical" as the "cure". Also if you're like me, you could careless about that and prefer your health.

Are we 100% sure this is it? nope, not me anyway, it could be something else, 5H1 whatever.. is the simplest answer usually the correct one? I'd say so, Occam's razor.

Does acknowledging this reverts things back automatically? no. In fact now the real work begins and I suspect is harder, way harder than swallowing pills (Though, may/could/can include that too!)

Does it helps with the despair of not knowing wtf is going on? I'd say so (abandoning hope, when possible, also helps with despair!)

I've been reading some of the books you suggest. I'd add: "The emperor's new drugs" by Irving Kirsch, too.

Are these symptoms real? absolutely. Can they drive a man to despair and even kill him? apparently.

The friggin mind distracting us from the true issue at hand which wasn't/ isn't our balls and dick but our mental health.

The friggin mind waiting for the right moment to make us think the cause was a pill, certainly not acting like a friend!

If I ever get my 100% back, i won't be returning. Take this as a sign I forgot about this forum (which has served it's purpose and thank you for that, Ghost) and went on with the next episodes of my life.

I'd call this: PPATAPP (psychosomatic phenomenon after taking a placebo pill).

Thank you for the perspective, Infinitizer.

Love and Compassion, brother.
JakeLawe,

Wow, thanks for bringing these profound thoughts back online. (Yours and JK24).

It also explains why there's a prevalence of people of people with a history of anxious/body obsessive thinking among PSSD suferers. I have also talked to people who had an official diagnosis of somatization disorder before taking any drugs, and now are convinced of only having complex ultra PSSD but "cured" of somatization disorder, which is by definition a severe state of worry about body symtoms and body damage. We are somehow dismissing the power of worries/obsessions have in numbing the sexual experience. Today, lots of cognitive behavioral therapy sessions I had in the past, started to make a lot of sense.

Cheers,
Arahant
Wellbutrin (2007 - 2018)
Wellbutrin + Sertraline (2015)
Wellbutrin + Ritalin (2016 - 2018)
Wellbutrin + Ritalin + Sertraline (3 months in 2018)
Buspirone (Feb 2019 - Today)
Ritalin + Buspirone (Nov 2019 - today)
Semogomes
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by Semogomes »

Bullshit. What about those ones who got it from one pill? Or during treatment? Don't come here with self help books for suicidal people
Semogomes
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Re: infinityzer00000 Log

Unread post by Semogomes »

JK24 wrote: Sat May 11, 2019 5:15 am I wanted to add my own experience if I may. I have suffered from depression on and off for the past few years, but over the last year it has gotten way worse. I took 5-HTP for a few days in January 2019 and have experienced PSSD symptoms after that.

Now here it goes: I agree with the OP and also with success stories like the one from Bunny. I also had lack of nocturnal erections and believed, this cannot be psychosomatic. However, there IS a link between hormones and thoughts. That‘s why you can treat depression both with psychotherapy and drugs! Cognitive behavioural therapy changes your irrational, twistes thoughts that causes your depression (which is NEVER based on realistic thoughts - read „Feeling Good“ by David Burns if you want to find out more), and drugs change hormones - BOTH have the effect of making you less depressed. So CLEARLY, thoughts can change hormones, and hormones/drugs can change thoughts. How could it be differently?

Furthermore, regular depression, without any medication envolved DOES cause physical symptoms! If you feel extremely tired or lose your appetite or slur your speech because you‘re depressed, those are PHYSICAL symptoms. So depression can cause physical symptoms just as much as medication can.

My view on this whole thing is that it can be treated ANALOGOUSLY to depression: by medication, by psychotherapy, or BOTH. My approach, just as for my depression, has been: I don‘t want to take antidepressants, I choose psychotherapy. And it has worked so far! EVER SINCE I started telling myself the following „I have low libido. Low libido is a SYMPTOM of depression. I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD have low libido as long as I suffer from depression“ my symptoms have IMPROVED. Once during sex with my ex-girlfriend she gave me a blowjob and I felt NOTHING. But then I quickly told myself: „Loss of pleasure from activities I used to enjoy is a SYMPTOM of depression, and I suffer from depression. Therefore I SHOULD get no pleasure from this blowjob“ and in an INSTANT, I felt more! In an INSTANT, as SOON as I relaxed JUST A BIT MORE, the blowjob felt AMAZING.

The same approach worked for basically COMPLETELY curing myself from pleasureless orgasms within a few days. I had a few good days where my depresion was almost gone, and when I masturbated I just told myself that sexual anhedonia, i.e. pleasureless orgasms, is a symptom of depression, therefore I should suffer from it. My orgasm quality improved CONSIDERABLY and has done ever since, to the point where I‘ve gotten USED TO having good orgasms again.

My morning erections also started returning when I stopped obsessing.

I have yet ANOTHER argument why this whole thing is psychosomatic, that was quite convincing to me: I NEVER really found any symptom that CANNOT be caused by depression. EVERY symptom I experienced and subsequently searched for, had depression as one possible cause. No matter what symptom I had, it could ALWAYS be attributed to depression.

Now some of you might say: But some of my symptoms are hard to describe, I just feel weird, not like myself.
Well, excessively worrying about your health and feeling weird, is a SYMPTOM OF DEPRESSION. In my life, 100% of the cases where I told someone „I just feel weird, I can‘t explain it, I feel like not my normal self, I can‘t stand it, I just want everything to be back to normal again!!“ it was PSYCHOSOMATIC, and I snapped out of it at the latest when I visited a doctor and he told me there was no physical reason.

ANOTHER argument that gave me a hint that it was psychosomatic, was that my symptoms always IMPROVED after I visited a doctor and I stopped worrying about the condition for a minute. The first time after I visited my GP, my girlfriend and I had FANTASTIC sex and I thought I was cured. Then I started worrying again and it started getting worse again. Have you ever notied that the more you worry, the worse the symptoms get? That gave me the clue that it‘s psychosomatic, because no PHYSICAL illness I‘ve ever had had this property. The second time after I visited the doctor and he told me „FORGET about the 5-HTP. It‘s 99% psychosomatic but I‘ll get you a transfer to an andrologist and check your hormones anyway, if it will help you relax and stop worrying“, my symptoms improved again!

On thing I also experienced: I worried about my testicle size. Anytime I felt bad, I could almost FEEL my testicles shrinking, thinking I had low testosterone. I SAW that they looked smaller. They FELT smaller. It was so PHYSICAL, it was so REAL. Can‘t be the depression, right? You CANNOT shrink your testicles by having irrational, twisted thoughts, right? So it MUST be physical. Well, I put my belief TO THE TEST: I MEASURED my testicles every day, sometimes when I thought they looked normal and healthy, and also when I felt like they are small and unhealthy. They were ALWAYS EXACTLY THE SAME SIZE. I THOUGHT that they looked smaller, I was CONVINCED. But it WASN‘T ACTUALLY TRUE. Furthermore I looked up „average testicle size“ and concluded that my testicles were even slightly above average in size, but totally in the normal range. I STOPPED worrying about my testicles since then!

The SAME thing happened with my sperm volume. I thought that I was producing less sperm. It MUST be physical right? Well, I started measuring and quickly found out that the sperm volume was not only always the same, it was also always in the normal healthy range (normal is 2-5ml, 4 ml being about a teaspoon full). Since then I STOPPED worrying about sperm volume and started having more normal feeling ejaculations.

I could go on, but you get the gist. If you want to find out more about cognitive behavioural therapy and how your thoughts influence your feelings, check out „Feeling Good“ by David Burns. Great book!

If you want to find out more about excessive worrying about your health / hypochondria, check out Wikipedia. For me, it was eye-opening to see that it seems to be a SYMPTOM of hypochondria that your symptoms improve after a visit at the doctor - it was the same way for me!

Finally, one thing that has helped me a lot was any kind of activity where you stop thinking - especially exercise. If you go for a run, or lift weights, or swim, or go cycling, and do it in way where you FOCUS on your BODY AND BREATH, or do it so fast that you are FORCED to take a BREAK FROM THINKING AND WORRYING, this can go a long way to help you relax and feel better. For me this has worked often.

One final note on 5-HTP: Since both DRUGS and PSYCHOTHERAPY/THOUGHTS can influence feelings, I think it‘s in no wqy implausible that a sudden withdrawal from an SSRI or 5-HTP can TRIGGER such symptoms and also thoughts that cause excessive worrying, just as durgs can alleviate depression symtpoms. However, you CAN treat them by changing your THOUGHTS, just as you can treat your depression by changing your thoughts. You see what I mean? That‘s just a basic feature of mental illnesses like depression, where both drugs and therapy can influence your symptoms. For me, PSSD falls into that same category.
One day long account. Oh yes, surely.
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