My story

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DerHerrS
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My story

Unread post by DerHerrS »

Hey guys!

After a long period of lurking I finally desided to register myself and i wanted to tell you a bit about me. I took Escitalopram two and a half years ago due to anxiety with obsessive tendenscies during a stressful year in medical school. And as it was the experiency of many of you after three days taking it I suddenly felt like a switch went off and everything related to sexuality weas completely erased from my brain, like it never existed. Libido dropped to zero and I developed genital numbness as well as weak orgasm. But for some reason back then I didnt really care about all those symptoms as i was literally just a robot. The Escitalopram didn't help against the anxiety at all btw. After 7 months i decided to taper off the Escitalopram and my symptoms never really improved. But still form some reason I didnt care about it. It all started when I wanted to start a relationship that i noticed subjectively that something was off, Kissing, sex and intimacy didnt interest me at all anymore. Of course the relationship ended soon and i was even more devastated as the person told me that she cant be in a relationaship like this (understandable) and is having a normal sex life now. I then started resarching and found PSSD quickly. A friend of mine who also was affected by PSSD took trazodone and it helped him, so i thought lets give it a shot, however I took if for 2 months up to a dose of 200mg and while i had some very short windows it really didnt do anything. Thats when i noticed also how emotionally numb i had become. From a happy go lucky guy that jerked off 3 times a day and was horny all the time to an emotionless zombie. I tapered off the trazodone and will start bupropion in two weeks, which is my only hope left i fear.

I want to stay hopeful, but the prospect of living this life without emotions, intimacy or sex scares me so much and if bupropion doesnt reverse the PSSD i genuinely dont know how to live anymore. I just need a place to vent and to feel understood. I know lots of you have been in such a situation like me and i just need support or otherwise im going to decompensate. I'm starting residency soon and in this state it wont be possible to push through. Thank you all!

Herr S
Escitalopram 10mg 03/2020 to 10/2020 immediate sexual symptoms
Trazodone up to 200mg 2 months in 2022 short windows, crash after withdrawal
Bupropion 150mg XR 2 weeks in 2022, good and longer windows, extreme emotional blunting after 10 days, CT‘d
Ykatan
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Re: My story

Unread post by Ykatan »

Keep calm dude, i'm sure trial and error can fix everything, there's a lot of recovery history, just get high and stay away from that ssri shit
sylv
Posts: 188
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Re: My story

Unread post by sylv »

First don't panic, problems will likely go much better in a matter of a year if you don't overstress yourself. Bupropion is not a PSSD treatment. It will likely make emotional blunting worse in long term, while no effect on genital anaesthesia.

Stimulants are somewhat ( effect is very blunted and minimal ) helpful for emotional blunting, but better go for acute Methylphenidate / Amphetamine. You would want to use bupropion ( antidepressant ) only if you are severely depressed. Brain is complex and mental diseases affect Post SSRI Syndrome / PAWS recovery
Numby
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Re: My story

Unread post by Numby »

I cannot agree with Sylv in the statement that bupropion will not do anything for genital anesthesia. It is possible that it has a positive effect on genital anesthesia. There are several reports of people who had their only windows on bupropion including myself.

On the other hand, it is true that bupropion can negatively affect emotional numbing after tapering (not in my case though). The most important thing and also the reason why I would not recommend bupropion in your case though is that you suffered from anxiety and obsessive thoughts. Bupropion will most likely make theses symptoms worse. Other amphetamines will most likely do the same. I’d stay away from this class of medication.

If I understand correctly, you just went off Trazodone. In this case, I would wait several months before you start other medications. Give your body some time to recover from Trazodone before you start something new. Trial and error can negatively impact your natural recovery process. I know several people who got worse over time and developed new symptoms from trying different meds and supplements. Please be careful with these things.
sylv
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Re: My story

Unread post by sylv »

Numby wrote: Thu Nov 10, 2022 2:53 pm I cannot agree with Sylv in the statement that bupropion will not do anything for genital anesthesia. It is possible that it has a positive effect on genital anesthesia. There are several reports of people who had their only windows on bupropion including myself.
There are also reports of people getting worse on bupropion. Even blaming this drug for crashing them into PSSD. Bupropion will help genital anaesthesia, if this symptom is aggravated by severe depression. This is what antidepressants treat. In regard to something such complex like brain diseases there is need to discriminate between primary - direct effect of medication vs secondary effect from affecting something else ( treating depression ).
Other amphetamines will most likely do the same. I’d stay away from this class of medication
Methylphenidate is not great for OCD if used daily, but amphetamines are better tolerated. Especially for P-OCD type which SSRIs can induce / make worse as a part of PSSD / PAWS. In contrast to chronic dosing- acutely dosed stimulants ( 1 or 2x per week ) will not likely make OCD worse in the long term. Contrary - they can help some forms of OCD.

Ofc Better to stay away from all the drugs / supplements to not create further havoc ( all drugs affecting neurotransmitters possibly create long term changes to the brain ). But sometimes meds are needed so this is a personal, risk / benefit choice.
Last edited by sylv on Fri Nov 11, 2022 7:58 am, edited 5 times in total.
Liz1999
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Re: My story

Unread post by Liz1999 »

I’ve been dealing with PSSD for a couple of years now. I have never been a fan of getting high, but I actually found a couple of cannabis products that really helped when I was ready to try anything. First, 1906 “Love” drops. It’s a low dose 1: 1 pill that you’ll feel in about a half an hour. Does loosen up the body and mind. You might need a couple of pills depending on your tolerance. Second, I infused a mix of coconut oil and jojoba oil with equal parts CBD flower and THC flower. You can find how to do this online. Use that as a personal lubricant, and it will help increase blood flow. Literally, the only things that have made a difference.
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Twentyoneguns
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Re: My story

Unread post by Twentyoneguns »

Also be aware that meds prescribed for totally non PSSD related conditions, mild or serious, may also cause you to crash or delay your recovery.

Tread very carefully.
Male
PSSD after 3 days on Sertraline (50mg) (Aurobindo) December 2016 to date.
Tinnitus, insomnia (1.5 hours/night sleep) poor memory/cognition as a bonus!
Possibly PSSD from October 1998...just didn't realise what I was suffering from! (pre internet)
Numby
Posts: 146
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Re: My story

Unread post by Numby »

sylv wrote: Thu Nov 10, 2022 6:09 pm
There are also reports of people getting worse on bupropion. Even blaming this drug for crashing them into PSSD.
That’s true. Recently, there have been such reports. But there are also several people that report the opposite.
Bupropion will help genital anaesthesia, if this symptom is aggravated by severe depression. This is what antidepressants treat.
This is absolutely not true. One of the side effects of bupropion is hypersexuality. This effect is completely unrelated to any symptoms of depression. Also Bupropion is less effective in treating depression than SSRIs. That’s why it is not the „first line“ treatment for depression.

Apart from that, if you read the reports of people who benefitted from bupropion concerning genital anesthesia, you will see that’s it’s mostly people who were mentally stable and did not suffer from depression.
In regard to something such complex like brain diseases there is need to discriminate between primary - direct effect of medication vs secondary effect from affecting something else ( treating depression ).
That‘s obvious and I couldn’t agree more. However, as I said, the pro-sexual effects that bupropion has in some patients are unrelated to the antidepressive effect. It appears to be a similar mechanism as in Parkinsons drugs (like Pramipexol for instance). It‘s a different story with other antidepressants that do not have a pro-sexual effect.

In general, PSSD symptoms are not influenced that much by state of mind because they are med-induced. If depression made PSSD symptoms significantly worse, this would indicate that we are not talking about an iatrogenic condition.
Methylphenidate is not great for OCD if used daily, but amphetamines are better tolerated. Especially for P-OCD type which SSRIs can induce / make worse as a part of PSSD / PAWS. In contrast to chronic dosing- acutely dosed stimulants ( 1 or 2x per week ) will not likely make OCD worse in the long term. Contrary - they can help some forms of OCD.
I agree that in the long term, amphetamines will not make ocd worse. If you stop them, the effect goes away. I was talking about the immediate effect that can result in obsessive thoughts. Where did you get the information that amphetamines can help OCD from?



Returning to the initial question of DerHerrS: I’d like to repeat that I would be very careful with amphetamine-like drugs and potent supplements in your case because you suffered from anxiety and obsessive thoughts.
DerHerrS
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Re: My story

Unread post by DerHerrS »

Thank you guys for the many replies! I unfortunately am in for me such an unbearable asexual and emotionally numb state that I would do everything just to get out and so i will try bupropion. I tried to study so much about neurobiology affecting PSSD and other enduring sexual syndromes, to help me understand whats going on and also as i want to be a neurologist after med school. However what I learned and what i also saw from case reports and experiences form other people that this disorder doesn't really make any sense and everything is possible. From people getting their sexuality completely erased by SSRI to people having still a high libido but numb genitals. Then the mirtazapine and trazodone stories where the effects are seemingly random and can go either side to the case reports of bupropion induced sexual dysfucntion, which is very rare though but can happen. And medications randomly stopping to work and so on and so on...

Also interestingly the SSRI didnt do anything for my OCD. The OCD only diminished after I stopped the SSRI weirdly.

So yes we are in a bad state and at least for me it doesnt make any sense to study the neurobiology anymore because everything is possible anyway. Still sucks to play lottery with ones sexuality and emotions. And thank you again for all the replies, it does make me feel understood and not so alone. And the hope that it gets better at least by 10% is what drives me to survive currently...
Escitalopram 10mg 03/2020 to 10/2020 immediate sexual symptoms
Trazodone up to 200mg 2 months in 2022 short windows, crash after withdrawal
Bupropion 150mg XR 2 weeks in 2022, good and longer windows, extreme emotional blunting after 10 days, CT‘d
sylv
Posts: 188
Joined: Thu Apr 27, 2017 6:32 am
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Re: My story

Unread post by sylv »

Numby wrote: Sat Nov 12, 2022 2:09 am
Bupropion will help genital anaesthesia, if this symptom is aggravated by severe depression. This is what antidepressants treat
This is absolutely not true. One of the side effects of bupropion is hypersexuality. This effect is completely unrelated to any symptoms of depression. Also Bupropion is less effective in treating depression than SSRIs. That’s why it is not the „first line“ treatment for depression. .
Hypersexualty not necessarily means any improvement in genital anesthesia. Could be as well the effect of antidepressant induced mania. Especially in the case of dopaminergic

I don't buy claim that the bupropion is sexually enchaining drug or treatment for SD. GSK was fined with billions for this false statement.

Apart from that, if you read the reports of people who benefitted from bupropion concerning genital anesthesia, you will see that’s it’s mostly people who were mentally stable and did not suffer from depression.
The reports on bupropion are more much diverse and heterogenic.
In general, PSSD symptoms are not influenced that much by state of mind because they are med-induced. If depression made PSSD symptoms significantly worse, this would indicate that we are not talking about an iatrogenic condition.
You are very wrong on this one. Brain is complex and everything is connected. Most recovery methods depends on the effect of time or strategies for mental and physical health. Comorbid mental illness or health problem could cause significant deterioration or stop recovery in Post SSRI Syndrome / PAWS.
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